Arise!

[e_jo_m]

When I was a kid, my pastor said on Easter service that Christianity requires that you believe that Jesus literally came back from the dead. Doesn't count if it's merely that Jesus' memory and legacy was kept in the hearts and minds of his fellows or some bulls--t like that.

I don't think this is true. Well, yes, it is true that interpreting the Resurrection as metaphorical is bulls--t, and that if you can believe that Jesus' dad created the universe then you can sure as h--l believe that He can do a little cellular regeneration; but I mean that this is too narrow a definition of Christianity. Suppose I am a Protestant who believes in the literal truth of the Bible. When I die and go to Heaven, God says, "Welcome! Before you go in, I need to clear up a big misunderstanding. Jesus was and is my sacred Son, made of the same substance as I; and He is God, just like me. However, He didn't actually come back from the dead; He descended into Hell, and then ascended straight to Heaven, where He remained and will remain until the end of days."

I'm not going to respond to this with, "Welp, I guess I'm no longer a Christian!" That would be really stupid. By contrast, if when I got to Heaven God said "I need to clear something up: Jesus is only the 'son of God' in the sense that King David was. He was a very good prophet, but no more divine than any other prophet", then I would say, "Oh, I guess I'm no longer a Christian."